


some good fuckin' omen you are

by putsch



Category: Eyeshield 21
Genre: Alternate Universe, Biblical References, Implied Sexual Content, M/M, Violence
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-01-15
Updated: 2017-01-15
Packaged: 2018-09-17 16:59:08
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,314
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9334346
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/putsch/pseuds/putsch
Summary: "Honestly, I'm surprised it took you two thousand years to fall. I figured you'd only need a millennium.""I always thought you'd fall first, you little shit."(the good omens AU no one asked for but me)





	

**Author's Note:**

> Written for SASO2016 BR5 - Fantasy AUS! This idea worked too well for me and these jackasses, so here we are. Months later. On AO3.

Agon didn't quite fall from grace - more like sauntered out of it.

  
  
He really doesn't care, either way, all Agon cared about was enjoying himself (a terrible trait for an angel) and not so much helping others or playing 'the good guy'. Eons ago, he somehow decided with his strength he's better than all that, or at least, he certainly doesn't need it. Unsui had tried so hard to keep him along the path of the right and good with God, but eh, fuck that guy. Actually, fuck both of them. Rules didn't seem to sit well with him.  
  
Fluffy white angel wings never suited him either. The sleek black skin jutting from his shoulders is a far more fitting look, and afford him a lifestyle he far more prefers.  
  
It's such a shame, the other angels say, shaking their heads, but Agon doesn't listen to them.  
  
"Honestly, I'm surprised it took you two thousand years to fall. I figured you'd only need a millennium."  
  
The only one he does listen to is Hiruma, who laughs around a blade of wheat between his pointed teeth. A friend like Hiruma is... an odd thing, to say the least. Helpful when you least expect it, and generally awful the rest of the time. Agon at least can respect his wits, even if the rest of him is annoying as all the hells below.  
  
"I always thought you'd fall first, you little shit." Agon says around a mouthful of smoke, and Hiruma laughs hard enough to shake a few of those fluffy white feathers off his back.

 

 

  
  
  
Hiruma never falls from grace.  
  
He watches for eons how Hiruma fills up little black book after little black book, tallying every human's sins for no apparent reason other than his own entertainment. He watches the way his teeth always go sharp, how he never softens his image to match the new one God wanted to make himself seem more merciful and kind to the weak and nervous mortals below. He's just as much of a demon as Agon is, and yet he never, ever, loses a single shred of pure white from his wings.  
  
It bugs Agon enough that he causes two horrific typhoons against invading Mongol troops before he goes in for a century long nap. He doesn't care, he refuses.  
  


 

 

  
  
When he wakes up, he finds himself in an art boom in Europe, drinking deep purple wines with Hiruma at his side.  
  
"You changed your hair this time, what the fuck am I supposed to call you now?" Hiruma jokes, running his hand through Agon's short gray hair before he can slap him away.  
  
"How about my name like a proper little angel should?"  
  
"Boring."  
  
Agon scowls. He did not invite Hiruma here, and Hiruma didn't invite him - they just happened to be hanging out near the same church at the same time, and well, things went from there. Agon really has to find a better way to tell Hiruma to fuck off for real. "Aren't you sick of it yet?"  
  
"This wine's bad but it ain't that bad." Hiruma replies, dry, like maybe if he sounds boring enough Agon will drop the question.  
  
As if. "You know what I mean."  
  
Hiruma's eyes go sharp and cold enough to drag the room temperature down with it in a way only Hiruma can do. "Did you fuckin' forget everything while you were asleep?"  
  
"Tch," Agon downs the last of his glass of wine. "I never knew what kept you up there boppin' around in Heaven like everything was coming up roses."  
  
The look on his face falls and gives way to pure shock, a look Agon's never seen on him in all the thousands of years they've known each other, before he hides it well behind a bark of laughter.  
  
"That's why you fell, cause you can't be assed to pay attention to anything but yourself."  
  
What a shitty answer.  
  


 

 

  
  
Somehow, it's not shitty enough to keep him from spending the entire 17th century with him in the Americas, keeping at eye on thriving tribes before incoming disaster. It's a perfect storm waiting to happen, and Hiruma and Agon both show up to be there at the ground floor of it.  
  
A shame they can't get involved when they spend too much time involved very literally in each other, teeth clacking in heated kisses and fur pelts against their backs.  
  


 

 

  
  
( Agon enjoys sitting back and watching the destruction in the aftermath.  
  
Hiruma leaves to get to work. )  
  


 

 

  
  
They don't see each other again until the invention of the car.  
  
More like, Agon sees Hiruma, and decides to watch what he's doing, because shitty answers to pressing questions still linger in his head and fuck if he's going to let Hiruma high and mighty lecture him ever again.  
  
He's flipping through what must be the billionth little black book, a terrifying grin plastered on his face before he slaps it shut and follows behind a skittish looking young man. Hiruma stops him, says a few things, scares the poor guy, and Agon wishes he could get closer to hear what they're talking about, but Hiruma would sense him if he took even a step closer in their direction. So he doesn't, he just watches the play of amusement on Hiruma and the fear on the human, his hands fidgeting and shaking around the sleeves of his shirt. He watches as Hiruma slaps him on the back and laughs (that Agon can hear, Hiruma never bothers to tone down his bright laughter), and takes him into a little cafe. They are there for hours, until eventually the young man doesn't look scared, he looks excited, bounding out the door with new energy.  
  
Agon goes inside, sits right down where the boy was.  
  
"Get lost on your way over?" Hiruma snorts, before calling over a waitress to order Agon a coffee with cream, no sugar.  
  
"Screw off." and now Hiruma's barely repressing a cackle, "What the hell did you do to that kid?"  
  
"I imbued him with magical fuckin' powers so now he can run like the wind."  
  
"...Ain't that against your fancy heaven rules?"  
  
Barely repressed goes to all out howling, and Agon is leaning over the table in no time flat to grab him by the shirt and shake him quiet.  
  
"If you wanna know, go follow him yourself you dipshit!" Hiruma's wiping the tears from his eyes, "Or not, fuck if I care."  
  
Agon gets up and leaves the cafe.  
  


 

  
  
It turns out, Hiruma in fact did not imbue this kid with magical powers (but damn, the kid can run). Instead, he gave him something a little bit more noble - a path in the right direction to get a little confidence.  
  
"Cheeky bastard." he mumbles to himself.  
  
A loud voice cuts in, "Thanks babe, I'm here all week."  
  
Agon's not surprised to see Hiruma, but he is surprised to see the full spread of Hiruma's wings above him. He hasn't seen those in a long, long time. "Oh fuck off!"  
  
Hiruma laughs, but this time it's not the wide, sharp cornered thing it was when they were in the cafe. This time it's softer, easy in it's tilt despite the harshness he chooses in all his other facial features. "Did you really not know, after all this time?"  
  
Agon flinches. What's he supposed to say? "No sweetheart, I didn't know you were collecting books upon books of humanity's worst deeds, not for your own amusement in the downtime of heaven but so you could figure out exactly how to push them in the opposite direction!" ? Hell no.  
  
"So what if I didn't?" Agon says instead, "It's not my business what you weirdo angels do in your free time."  
  
Hiruma shakes his head, "And that's why it took you a full two thousand years to fall, fucking stubborn dumbass."


End file.
